How introversion can be a super-power

The other day I was discussing with a client how she could explain her preferred communication style to her new boss. She has an introversion preference and was worried that he would misinterpret her quietness as not having an opinion, lacking confidence or being disengaged.

It reminded me of so many conversations I’ve had with friends, colleagues and clients over the years about introversion, and how it’s often seen, even by introverts themselves, as a problem. I’ve heard people describe themselves as ‘a slow processor’, ‘having nothing to say’ and ‘not thinking as quickly as others’. And of course, these opinions will often come from how others have described them in the past.

As a self-identified champion of people and their development, I find myself constantly reminding others that introversion is not about being shy, lacking confidence or being reticent, in the same way, that having an extroversion preference doesn’t automatically make you the life and soul of the party. But often, introverts can come to believe that they are somehow lacking in the face of their extrovert counterparts.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

In a world which currently values speed over thoughtfulness and loudness over quietness, it’s easy to see why extroversion behaviour can often dominate teams and even organisations. But with an estimated 16-50% of the global population being introverts¹ (depending on the region), we need to understand the benefits of introversion and how to unleash this super-power so that individuals and teams can be more effective.

So what is introversion (and extroversion)?

Introversion / extroversion is a key personality trait – witnessed by the number of times it crops up in personality theories – most famously the Big 5 and those based on Carl Jung’s work. It’s important to remember that introversion-extroversion is a spectrum in which we will all move a little – some days we’ll feel more introverted and other days, more extroverted. There is evidence that many people could be called ‘ambiverts’² – and that self-labelling as introverted or extroverted can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Despite appearances, extroversion and introversion are not about confidence or sociability. They are about energy.

Those with an introversion preference:

• Gain energy from concentration and reflection
• Prefer to reflect internally before speaking/ acting
• Tend to be more contained in their communication (verbal and non-verbal)
• Will seek out quiet and solitude to re-charge their batteries

Those with an extroversion preference:

• Gain energy from interaction with others
• Prefer to get into action and reflect later
• Tend to be more expressive in their communication (verbal and non-verbal)
• Will seek out other people and activities to re-charge their batteries

As a result of these differences, some introverts may experience:

• Being talked over in conversations and meetings
• Others saying what you hadn’t had a chance to
• The conversation moving on before you’ve had time to give your view
• Seeing others as ‘attention-seeking’

I’ve heard introverts talk about feeling disenfranchised, undervalued and overlooked. And yet, there are also some extremely successful reportedly introverted leaders out there including Barack Obama and Bill Gates.

Introversion in fact comes with a myriad of benefits:

• Thinking deeply about things, giving often greater consideration and analysis to the world around them
• Thinking through their opinions before giving them – which means when they do have something to say, people (usually!) listen
• Powers of observation – sitting back and watching what is happening around them
• Being able to concentrate for longer periods of time
• Feeling comfortable with silence
• Often finding it easier to listen, which enables a deeper understanding of others and of issues
• Finding creative ways to express themselves, such as music, art and writing

The world needs a balance – of quietness and reflection as well as energy and action. Having a mix of both preferences in your collaborative group or team is a real asset. The key is to effectively utilise both.

But if you recognise the challenges and preferences described above, then how can you use introversion as a superpower?

The following is based on research and what introverted clients have told me. None of this is hard and fast and the best approach is to ask yourself and your colleagues what would be helpful to them.

If you’re an introvert:

• Understand what introversion really is, as opposed to what it may look like to you and others.
• Value the strengths that it brings
• Manage your interactions with others – let them know what you need to get the best out of you
• Explain your style. The client I mentioned earlier decided she would explain to her new boss that she only speaks when she feels something needs to be said. Someone I used to work with used to say: ‘I’m a reflector, so I’d like some time to think about this issue before responding.’
• You may need to be prepared to give a view or opinion which hasn’t fully been thought through. You could caveat this by saying ‘These are my initial thoughts.’
• Be prepared to share what you’re thinking and feeling, as it can be harder to read an introvert’s body language
• Follow up after a conversation with additional helpful information or insights that you have reflected on
• Choose roles and environments which suit your preference for longer periods of concentration and focus
• Learn from others and how they manage their relationships, personal brand and career as an introvert

As a team:

Do:

• Build rapport and strong relationships with all team members – get to know everyone and how they prefer to approach things
• Allow time for reflection. Send out any key information and the agenda prior to a meeting so that those who want time to reflect can have it
• Create an opportunity for people to add thoughts/ opinions after the discussion
• Ask open questions to encourage debate
• Facilitate conversations in a variety of ways – including using some individual reflection before sharing thoughts
• Be aware of how much you’re talking and dominating the conversation.
• Allow and value silence. Silence can be a challenge because we often feel so busy and pressed for time, that we just want to get on. Nancy Kline has created a lovely method for allowing everyone the same amount of time in a meeting and valuing silence

Don’t:

• Put people on the spot – even if it’s meant as a way of bringing people in, I’ve been told that because they prefer to reflect, people with an introversion preference would rather not be put on the spot. Better to ask them to come up with their thoughts or give them time to reflect before answering.
• Assume that if someone is quiet, they have no opinion

All of this boils down to a better understanding of ourselves and others so that we can get the best out of each other and collaborate more effectively. Stop comparing yourself with others – knowing who you are and what you bring can develop your confidence to stay true to your authentic best self.

¹ What Percentage of The World is Introvert? 13 Shocking Stats (personalitiesunlocked.com)

² Introversion | Psychology Today

Further resources…

Read:

Silent Leadership: How Introverts Can Be Excellent Leaders Despite Societal Stereotypes (forbes.com)

“Can I Be a Leader If I’m an Introvert?” | Psychology Today

Quiet: The Power of Introverts In a World That Can’t Stop Talking, Susan Cain

Watch:

Susan Cain: The power of introverts | TED Talk

Nikki Ling: Quiet Confidence: Follow the Introverted Leader | TED Talk

Listen:

Introverts Can Be Leaders Too (hbr.org)